Saturday, August 4, 2012

Life lesson

It has been way too long since I have sat down and poured out my heart on paper to my sweet kiddos....I have been faced with my own problem of choosing feelings over facts. This has been a MAJOR problem of mine my whole life but especially so in the last several years.
I "feel" mad so I act ugly. I "feel" tired so I don't (fill in the blank).  I don't "feel" love towards (fill in the blank) so I (fill in the blank). There are many things that fill in the blanks for me....in fact, too many to choose one. As Christians we are called to rise ABOVE our feelings and live our lives on the truths, the facts, we know and read in the bible.
One of the many truths my mom has told me MANY times over the years and is so true is "Love is not a feeling. It is a choice." There is no better relationship than marriage to apply this to in my mind. The roller coaster of feelings in a marriage can take you to great highs and very low depths. I have not always felt the love towards Russ but when the feelings aren't there I have had to choose love. It is not easy but it is always right. I am not talking about extreme circumstances- I am talking about the wear and tear of life on a relationship.
Another fact over feelings is CHOOSING JOY! Actually living out the quote "bloom where you are planted." This is biblical!!
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4
This doesn't just apply to the big things- the major things that happen to us. This applies to the daily grind- when you wake up to a shower with no hot water....you can still have a good day or when your kids have fought all day long and you can't stand one more second of it.....I have a choice! Do I give in to my feelings and scream my head off like I want to do or can I rise above that and discipline out of a heart of love? What about when my hubby doesn't respond the way I want him to during a conversation or he doesn't provide enough support to meet my standards....I still have a choice in how I react. 
I feel my thoughts are all over the place and my point is being missed in my jumble of my words ....bottom line. Please allow your CHRIST to control your thoughts- 
"We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ."-  2 Corinthians 10:5
It is a choice to give in to negative thoughts and let them control us or allow Christ to capture our thoughts and allow Him to TEACH our thoughts to obey Christ. It is a process. It is not easy but it is doable. I pray today and will continue to pray that Christ will renew my mind and change my thought processes to reflect Him and His heart. I see myself in some of your actions and it hurts. Already my negative feelings/actions are rubbing off and I don't want to set you up to live a selfish, me centered world. My prayer for each of you, Lexi, Lauren, and Will is that you  will love Christ with your whole heart and your greatest desire will be to serve Him. Let me show you a life such as this.

You are my heart. Mama

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